Much of our discourse surrounding the total suckness of 2016 has involved death. David Bowie. Leonard Cohen. My sense of self-worth. But we don’t spend nearly enough time talking about the things that were reborn! This is more important that Jesus; I am talking about Chipotle!
Full disclosure: I took my senior pictures at Chipotle. I don’t know what purpose disclosing this has, but I just wanted to let you know.
In November of 2015, Chipotle shut down 43 of their restaurants over concerns of an E. coli outbreak.
Over the following months, there was mass hysteria. People worried that a quick stop for a quick burrito would be their last. Lines dwindled. So did sales.
The apocalypse lasted 3 months. On Feb. 1, 2016, the CDC announced that the days of being stressed about burritos were finally over. Millions wept. Burritos could now be a coping mechanism for dealing with stress, not the source of it!
However, despite the fact that Chipotle had done the time for its delicious crimes, people were hesitant to get back into line. Maybe they were still scared. Maybe they were upset. Maybe they found something else to fill the hole that Chipotle once occupied.
But Chipotle fought back. Free Chips & Guac! Buy-One Get-One! The coupons appeared relentlessly, until …
A free entree after every fourth, eighth and 11th Chipotle binge of the month. July. August. And September. Lines were long. Chipotle was made great again (Donald Trump was furious because he thought Chipotle was real Mexican food).
I ate at least 40 burritos in 3 months. Okay, that’s not entirely true. Sometimes I had a bowl, or a salad (never the tacos). By the time school started again, I had won free catering. I dangled it in front of my dorm floor in a failed attempt to make friends. 2016 was truly the summer of Chipotle.
Headlines may claim that Chipotle has yet to fully recover, but that’s just what makes the journey to get there all the more beautiful.
Dining hall plans come and go. A burrito is forever.