Let’s start with talking about Audrina’s secretarial buzzing system. What is this, Mad Men? Why is that necessary? As if Audrina actually sits at her dining room table and does real work, waiting for someone to buzz downstairs.
Kristin went back to Laguna to visit home and apparently even her stepmom is afraid of her. It was downright uncomfortable (and hilarious) when Kristin’s stepmom entered with her yoga mat, unbeknownst to her that Kristin was visiting home, and gave her a booty-out awkward hug. Can’t you just picture daddy’s little girl torturing this woman as a child? Or still? Also, Kristin’s dad seemed to be getting higher and higher throughout the conversation, culminating in a long, dazed pause before his final words. Maybe even he needs to relax before dealing with Kristin.
Holly. Need I say more? Hot mess. And thank you Stephanie for enlightening us with your alcoholic expertise. It was much appreciated.
And Justin Bobby. Two words: Coked. Out. Possibly the most ever on the show. And he was cooking Kristin dinner? How did the cameramen not intervene before he lit his hair on fire? And then he calls Kristin a “wildcard.” Really? Like, really? Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.
Kristin: Try to make an effort at subtlety. We all know you’re just a raging sexpot inside, but please. You don’t have to cut off a wonderful dinner JB cooked for you just so you can get it on.
I loved the relative ease with which Holly accepted her failure at life. It was a little strange, but also pretty nice. There’s only room for one alchie on this show, and Jade takes the prize.
And then of course, the JB-Audrina rendezvous. Wait, what? Why are they meeting? We did get a glimpse into Justin Bobby’s soul when he claimed, “I would never be able to say anything was better than Audrina Patridge. Ever in my life.” So sweet. I wanna believe him. But I can’t. And Audrina took the bait. Justin Bobby is playing her once again
Brody and Kristin getting back together again? What is this, 2006? Cannot WAIT for next week.
Final verdict: Substance abuse and Justin Bobby shenanigans? I’ll take it.