I love it when game companies release supplemental media (books, short films, comics) that complement their games. Though my logical side knows it's just a way to earn more money, my storyteller side loves when writers and artists are able to flesh out the canon of my favorite video game franchises with side material. What I can't get excited for, though, are video game movies, but it's becoming more and more apparent that video game movies remain an inevitable part of Hollywood's agenda.
On Feb. 6, at the D.I.C.E. Summit keynote, serial sci-fi director J.J. Abrams and Valve president Gabe Newell revealed that they had been throwing around the idea of making movies based on two of Valve’s most lucrative franchises: Portal and Half-Life. This announcement was met with reactions all over the emotional spectrum, from uncontained excitement to cautious skepticism to rage at the thought that Abrams might get his hands on even more beloved universes.
The fact of the matter is, though, making a movie based on a video game has never really been a winning endeavor. It seems that every video game movie that comes out falls into one of a few mediocre categories. So as we wait and see which category these hypothetical Valve movies will fall into – or if they pave the way for a new category entirely – let’s take a look at the kinds of video game movies we have to choose from today.
The “Video game movie in name only” movie
Notable examples: Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time, the Resident Evil series
If you’re a movie producer trying to make a video game movie, this is probably the best trope you can aim for. These are the movies that don’t really have anything to do with their source material outside of a few retained names and a handful of tip-of-the-hat references. These movies may not get a lot of attention from hardcore fans of the original series, but they’re generally the most successful video game movies out there. Prince of Persia ended up making a decent amount of money, and they keep churning out new Resident Evil sequels so they must be doing relatively well in the box office.
The secret behind these movies is that the producers don’t worry about owing anything to the source material. They make it just recognizable enough to cash in on the popularity of the franchise but otherwise focus on making a decent movie. When Disney started making their Prince of Persia movie, it was clear they weren’t focusing on staying faithful to the original. They took a couple of major plot points (Arabian city, dagger with time-travelling capabilities), forgot the nitty-gritty details and did what they do best: make a visually exciting, kid-friendly action movie. The same story happened with Resident Evil. The producers took the theme of viral zombies and the phrase “Umbrella Corporation,” and that’s where the similarities stopped. There’s no Jill or Leon, just a typical zombie-killing movie that tries to separate itself from the fold using the Resident Evil brand.
Once you've isolated the two plot points you want to use, just slap on a moderately attractive lead (Jake Gyllenhaal, Milla Jovovich) and, boom, you’ve got an okay movie.
The “So bad, it’s kinda good” movie
Notable examples: Mortal Kombat, Street Fighter
Almost everybody can enjoy a crappy fighting movie every now and then, and these movies certainly have their place in that genre. For fans of the original games, however, these movies have that extra layer of references and fan service that definitely makes them at least a bit more enjoyable. As fun as it is to sit through Mortal Kombat and Street Fighter for all of the exaggerated combat, unintentionally hilarious dialogue and special effects only slightly better than claymation, the best part of these movies for fans of the games is seeing all of the references to the games they cram into the film.
While watching Mortal Kombat, I caught myself giggling every time Shang Tsung said something like “Flawless victory!” or “Finish him!” after a match. I may or may not have squealed in excitement when a kunai came out of Scorpion’s palm and I recognized it from the infamous “Get over here!” move. And the best part of it is the anticipation. You see all of these recognizable references to this franchise, and you know which ones are still coming. After more than an hour of buildup I actually cheered once Liu Kang finally busted out his iconic Bicycle Kick toward the end of the film.
Street Fighter has a similar effect, though it does aim for a little more realism than Mortal Kombat. It is still satisfying to hear Ryu shrieking, “Shoryuken!” during a fight. Plus, it’s easy to get really into it, sitting on the edge of your seat during all of Ryu’s and Ken’s fights, waiting for that Hadouken that you hope is just around the corner. These kinds of video game movies can be really fun to watch, but don’t expect them to garner any critical acclaim. These movie snobs just don’t understand the joy of seeing Jean-Claude Van Damme perform Guile’s backflip kick on M. Bison.
The “What are you doing? Please make it stop” movie
Notable example: Super Mario Bros., Double Dragon
Oh, Nintendo. When are you going to start taking your intellectual property seriously? First you give us not one, but two ridiculous Mario cartoons. Then you let this piece of work loose in theaters. The worst part about this movie is that the writers try so hard to infuse some pseudo-realism into the Mario storyline. Some genius in Hollywood sat down and said, “You know, kids are never going to believe a movie about two brothers rescuing a princess in a fantasy world. We better make it about an alternate dinosaur dimension trying to fuse with the human world. They’ll be able to follow that better.”
Not even the references they try to throw in save the movie, and boy, do they try. The underlying problem is that they try to insert these references from the game, but they have to shoehorn them into this completely separate plot they for whatever reason decided was better than the original. So instead of being short little mushroom minions, Goombas become de-evolved dinosaur men (no, I cannot make that sentence any clearer). And the reason the Mario brothers can jump so high is they have some sort of rocket-powered spring shoes. But no matter how many Bullet Bills or Bob-ombs they manage to pack in, the writers still couldn’t save this ultimate mess of a movie. Really the only good thing about this movie is that it brought this catchy little song back into the spotlight.
An honorable mention in this category is Double Dragon, which holds the distinction of being the only movie based on a video game to earn a whopping 0 percent on Rotten Tomatoes. And it suffers from the same problem. The writers take source material whose plot can be boiled down to the sentence, “This guy’s girl gets taken so he and his buddy beat people up on the street,” and they try to fabricate some elaborate back story that doesn’t need to be there. This should probably be a lesson to filmmakers: Don’t try to make a movie out of source material that was designed to be mind-numbingly simple. I’m looking at you, Battleship.
So it doesn’t look good for video game movies. They either come out horrible, or they deviate so far from the source material that they shouldn’t even be associated with the franchise. There is hope, though. It wasn’t long ago that comic book movies were very sloppily and carelessly made – in fact, there are still terrible comic book movies today. But the genre has really exploded over the past decade, and every summer you can expect a handful of really quality superhero movies to break the box office. Valve has proven that they care about their intellectual property, and I would bet they won’t take the decision to invest in a movie lightly. And with talks of Assassin’s Creed and Uncharted movie deep in the works, there may be hope that among all these Howard the Ducks we’ll soon see the Dark Knight of video game movies we’ve all been waiting for.