Ted and Barney are back at their favorite strip club, but even the promise of pole dances can get the thought of Quinn from Barney’s mind. You remember Quinn, the wing lady Barney slept with two episodes ago who saw past his many plays and called him out on his problems? Now he says sees her everywhere he looks—which turns out to be quite literally true when they realize she’s a stripper at the Lusty Leopard (the same place Stripper Lily works!).
After debating whether he wants to get serious with a stripper, Barney realizes (or rather, Ted states and Barney denies, then Barney assumes all credit for the idea) that destiny might be bringing them back together. When he tells Quinn (or “Karma,” as she’s known at work) how he feels, though, she claims that she doesn’t date customers and Barney buys a lap dance in order to get to know her better. One dance turns into a night of dances, as every time Barney thinks he’s getting somewhere with Quinn, the song ends and he pays for another one. When recounting his misadventures, Barney is sure that she has genuine feelings for him (because she agreed to a date the next night), but Ted insists she’s playing him (because the date was at the Lusty Leopard). While on their “date,” Barney sees Quinn pulling the same trick on another guy and realizes he’s been duped. He admits he deserves this abuse from Karma (literally and figuratively) for his past mistreatment of women, but he’s been trying to be a better person and Quinn has essentially proven that effort futile. However, destiny (the fated force, not another stripper) unites them once again the next morning in a coffee shop, and a rightfully bitter Barney gives his first sincere statement in a while: “Almost every woman I’ve ever met was wrong to give me a chance. You’re the first one who’s wrong not to.” So what else can Quinn do then but buy him coffee and have an actual date?
In the meantime, Marshall and Lily take Robin in after she moves out of Ted’s apartment. They’re overly excited to show her every aspect of life for couples in Long Island, which she observes in the style of a NatGeo television special. After a few days of generic snuggies, bowling club and bingo, Robin is desperate to get out of suburbia—but Marshall and Lily come up with every excuse imaginable to keep her there. After foiling her escape plan, they confess that they’re trying so hard to get Robin to stay because they don’t like Long Island at all—they’re only staying because they’re convinced it’ll be better for their baby.
If Ted wasn’t doing well before when he was just single, he’s in even worse shape while single and heartbroken. His now-vacant guest room makes the apartment feel too empty, so he uses it to take up new hobbies. After failed attempts at smoking meat, carpentry and pottery – not to mention some conversations with an imaginary Robin—he figures out that no matter what he fills the room with, it’s always going to feel haunted. And when the real Robin returns to pick up the rest of her things and tell Ted about her suburban nightmare, Lily and Marshall’s dissatisfaction with their lives becomes a metaphor for their own relationship: you can’t just force things to make them work. So he calls the Lily and Marshall to visit the city, and they arrive at a completely empty apartment, save for a note from Ted: they need to live in the city where they’re happy, he never took their names off the lease and he needs a change. Logical solution? Move out, so Lily and Marshall can start their family in the place they’ve always called home.
It seems almost too easy for the next live interest in Barney’s life to be with a stripper. I understand that the show is trying to give him a dose of his own medicine, I really do. But the Quinn storyline is already starting to feel as forced as Nora’s: Barney vehemently denies his feelings, then suddenly he not only accepts them, but embraces them? At this point, it’s all a little too sudden to believe. On the plus side, though, everyone’s favorite couple is staying in the city. Not only that, but instead of having Ted wallow as he typically would, he’s actually making positive differences in his life by moving on and moving out. It’s one of many major changes that the show has made as of late, and it’s a good way to keep the seventh season from getting stale. Also, don’t think we didn’t notice that MacLaren’s was not featured in this episode at all. Maybe this means something; maybe this group of so-called adults is actually growing up. Then again, they spent same amount of time they’d normally waste in the bar in a strip club, so maybe not.
Highlights
Remarking on the likelihood of Barney seeing Quinn again:
Ted: Maybe it’s destiny.
Barney: Nah, Destiny strips at the Melon Patch. They’re people, Ted. Try to keep them straight.
Barney: If it’s not a date, then why did she tell me every fifth dance is free?
Ted: Because that’s the Lusty Leopard’s policy on Friday nights, and I am so mad at you that I know that.
With Quinn at the coffee shop:
Barney: Well, at my job we don’t rip out people’s hearts for money. My company briefly backed a lab in North Korea that did, but we sold it.