Sarah Palin: the anti-cute-animal candidate
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    There are myriad reasons to hate Sarah Palin. Just search her name on YouTube and you’ll find enough videos to win you over to the “let’s shoot her into the sun” camp. Seriously, you don’t need any more reasons to loathe her.

    But, since I need to update this and the vice-presidential debate goes down tonight, here are a few more attempts to sway any of you undecided voters who just want to look as moderate as possible (not having an opinion is the best opinion of all!). If you have any room in your heart for cute animals, the following Palin points should convince you the Republican ticket (you know, with whats-his-face) are not the right people to have in power if you value adorable critters.

    Polar Bears

    At the start of this year, Palin wrote an op-ed in The New York Times arguing against adding polar bears to the nation’s list of endangered species. Polar bears aren’t in any major danger, she writes, because Alaska (home to one-fifth of the world’s polar bear population: She can see them from her house!!!) does all it can to protect them. OK, I can dig that. Who wouldn’t want to protect these guys?

    Global warming is the biggest threat to polar bears today. In her op-ed, Palin says this isn’t a good enough reason to protect polar bears, and that there are more than enough polar bears in the world (contrary to the information in the link above). “Environmental issues [should be] weighed against economic and social needs,” she argues. OK… but really? You want to ignore something like this?

    Polar bears are truly cool animals and should be protected. If you were caught up in “Knutmania,” you understand. Watch the video below, and tell me you don’t want to hug that polar bear cub to protect him from Bad Old Global Warming.

    Aerial Wolf Hunting

    I’m not a big fan of hunting in general. I can see value in it if you hunt to gather food and survive, but in America today, you don’t need to snipe off deer in the forest to eat. Drive to Wal-Mart and buy some Teddy Grahams. Hunting is nothing more than a sport or a pastime to a lot of people today. I don’t support it, but I imagine there are worse things in the world.

    Sarah Palin supports aerial wolf hunting, one of the most diabolical practices I’ve ever had the misfortune to hear about. I may not dig hunting, but I can at least appreciate the difficulty of it. It probably takes considerable skill to shoot an elk in the wild. Aerial wolf hunting, on the other hand, is like dropping an atomic bomb on fish in a barrel. It’s a disgusting activity. The video below sums up why it’s so evil. Cute at the start, but it turns bad soon. Sometimes the world is ugly, though, and you have to see it in all its repulsive splendor.

    Truly terrible stuff, and it tells you a lot about Sarah Palin’s character that she can endorse such a heartless thing. That feeling of hate gets stronger after watching these cute wolf pups.

    Still not convinced? The video below should push you over. If a rapping pug can’t convince you this stuff is messed up, you have a heart of ice.

    Etc.

    There are a ton more reasons Sarah Palin is the anti-cute animal candidate. She’s a big supporter of Safari Club International, an organization which, if you look at the records page, hunts anything that moves (check out the straight-out-of-bizarro-Denny’s African Grand Slam). She supports drilling in Alaska, a move that would put a lot of animals in harm’s way. Finally, watch this video, which sums up everything without the help of hip-hop dogs.

    For the record, I’m not endorsing veganism. Even I’m not that extreme, not with the Baconator in existence.

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