Just like missionary in your bed can get boring, so can doggy style in Deering Field and reverse cowgirl on top of Tech. Well, maybe not, but some of you might want to mix things up in the bedroom, and what better way to experiment than with sex toys? Sex toys have become mainstream both for alone-time playing and for couples’ experimentation. Here are some fun ones that you might be able to convince your partner to try out next weekend.
- Vibrators. You’ve all heard of vibrators. They’re pink and girly and just for girls to console themselves with when they’re single, right? Well, not so much anymore. Vibrators come in all shapes and sizes: there are clitoris vibrators, g-spot vibrators, dual action vibrators, no hands vibrators, plastic vibrators, silicone vibrators… you get the picture. But a new kind of vibrator has emerged. The Ohmibod vibrators are compatible with iPods and most mp3 players, and vibrate to the rhythm and intensity of the music. If you have trouble getting in synch with your partner, this is a fun way to get it on.
These are great when you’re alone and lonely, but they can be fun in partner sex too. One partner can watch while the other warms herself up or one partner can take the reins during foreplay or sex. You can hold it to your partner’s clit, or you can get creative. Just make sure you have a fun sex mix ready with some Marvin Gaye on it. - Scarves. Scarves are in right now, so a lot of girls are going to have them lying around their rooms. So why not put them to use in your sex life? Light bondage may sound scary, but if you feel comfortable with your partner, being tied up can add a new dimension to sex. If you’re restrained, you’re powerless, but hey, you get to lie back and enjoy.
On the other side, seeing your partner at your command can be a real turn-on. Rope, thongs, or even fuzzy handcuffs are great alternatives if you don’t want to risk getting your pretty scarves dirty. Just make sure you’re communicating. If you’re the free one, you have to stay aware of how your partner is doing. Stop means stop. - Sex Pillows. The Right Position produces a wedge shaped pillow that they claim enhances pleasure and comfort for intercourse and oral sex. Apparently, you can reach unexplored erotic zones. It’s probably cheaper to stack some pillows on top of each other, but if you have cash to spare, why not try to find some new feel-good places?
- Penis rings. You may have seen these around but would never actually try one. Penis rings are used to make the penis stay harder and bigger for longer, heightening sensation for the guy. Why wouldn’t you want to try that? You can buy hard ones (but you have to get fitted for them) or soft ones that stretch and go over the shaft and scrotum before he’s erect. Just make sure it’s increasing the size only slightly; if there’s too much swelling that means something’s wrong.
Penis rings seem undervalued, though. They’re cheap, usually starting around $10, unless you want to get even more frisky and get intense vibrating ones, and make both parties have more fun. - Anal beads. I know, they sound so scary. Still, if your partner has a thing for anal but you don’t want to go there or are a little nervous to just jump right in, these can be a good alternative or first step. Most start out small on the end and get increasingly bigger on the strand. They’re usually made of plastic or silicone. If you get plastic, it’s a good idea to put a condom over them; plastic is porous and can trap bacteria. Either way, clean them afterwards. This is a gender-neutral toy, so either partner can use them.
If you’re just beginning to explore anal play, it’s a good idea to start out small. Make sure the beads are smooth or they could make tears in the rectum, which could cause infections or at very least make using the restroom an unpleasant event for the next few days. Also, make sure the end has a wide handle or base to ensure they don’t all slip inside you. Things can get lost up there, and it can’t be comfortable, especially when you have to go to the ER. It sounds like there are a lot of dangers with anal beads, but once you get used to the idea and make sure you have a safe toy, you can experience all sorts of new, intense feelings. The anus is full of nerve endings, and playing around there can feel great. Just make sure you’re relaxed and use a lot of lube to make things safe and comfortable. - Strap-ons: A strap-on is a dildo used with a harness. These are usually thought of as a strictly lesbian sex toy, but really, anybody can have fun with them. Both men and women can wear strap-ons. They’re particularly popular among trans-men. Strap-ons can be used for masturbation, oral, anal or vaginal sex. While they’re usually pricier, they definitely can be worth it — think of all the different things you can do with it. Just remember to wash the dildo with water and antibacterial soap, or boil it to sterilize it after every use. If it’s going up a bum, you must wash it thoroughly. If it’s going in a vagina, it’s safer to put a condom on it. Just remember to use a new condom for every new use.
A vibrator and a little “lubrication” guarantees a good time. Photo by Kamil Porembinski on Flickr, licensed under the Creative Commons.
Get into a 70s’ vibe with a gold lame strap-on. Photo by pinkmoose on Flickr, licensed under the Creative Commons.
These sex toys only hit the tip of the iceberg of the world of sex toys. If you’re feeling frisky, there are several sex stores in Chicago, like the ones listed in the sidebar, that have workers who know what they’re talking about and can answer your questions. Now go play, and make sure to wash your toys before and after use.
Sarah Crocker is a contributor from Sexual Health & Assault Peer Education.