Just after midnight, less than a day before the nation was set to fall off the fiscal cliff, Sen. Mitch McConnell, R-Ky., picked up the phone and reached out to an old friend. Negotiations between President Obama and House Speaker John Boehner had broken down, and the senator could not work with his wily counterpart, Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid. So he called Vice President Joe Biden, with whom he worked for 25 years in the Senate, to figure out how to prevent the country from tumbling over the cliff.
Here are excerpts from that series of conversations, as told by NBN:
[phone rings]
Joe Biden: Mitch? Why are you calling? Jill's asleep right now, so let's keep it short. Is this about gun control?
Mitch McConnell: Joe, you know very well what this is about.
JB: I know, I'm just pulling your leg. After all these tense discussions between Barry and Boehner, I needed some time to look at what's really happening here and why the two sides can't come together. How's Elaine [Chao, McConnell's wife and former secretary of Labor under the Bush administration]?
MM: She's doing well. But Joe, we're ready to deal. The GOP is breathing down my neck. Boehner and the president can't agree on anything. I need a dance partner on this one. We need to tango.
JB: Like we did 25 years ago, on the dance floor in the middle of that casino in Vegas? Now that was a night to remember.
MM: No! You know what I mean.
JB: OK, OK. Calm down, Mitch. This deal is putting some stress on you. I'm starting to feel it. Barry feels it. Boehner is more flushed than usual and the GOP freshmen are starting to revolt, again. We need a bipartisan deal that will avert the fiscal cliff and put the country in the right direction. You've come to the right place, my friend.
MM: Joe, you're the only person I can talk to about this. No one on either side is willing to listen. I'm going to tell the Senate tomorrow that we are talking and trying to negotiate a deal that works for both parties. We need this. Our country needs this. We can't end up like Europe! Will you dance with me?
JB: Are you sure your wife wouldn't mind?
MM: One dance couldn't hurt.
The conversations last throughout the night and into the day, with interludes of exchanged stories and memories. The mood of the conversation swings from calm to tense in the pendulum of political discourse.
Mitch, a straitlaced, fastidious politician, gets straight to the point and presents his plan. He proposes a plan that would extend the Bush tax cuts on family income of $750,000 and below, keep tax rates on the wealthy at 35 percent, slow the growth of Social Security cost-of-living increases and pay off the sequester by means-testing Medicare. On the other hand, the White House plan calls for tax cuts for family incomes below $350,000, and a tax rate increase of roughly 5 percent for those above $350,000, and a way to deal with the across-the-board spending cuts, as well as an extension of unemployment benefits.
Biden, gregarious by nature, talks Mitch through the plans in the hopes of reaching a compromise. Whether they will do so, however, is up in the air. What pushes this negotiation is the old guard of action: discussion.
JB: Looks like we are stuck between a rock and an order of Potbelly sandwiches.
MM: While that sounds good, I think we need to settle on something. The Senate needs to vote on this today.
JB: Okay, so what do we have so far? We've increased the tax rates on incomes for couples making over $450,000, extended unemployment benefits for another year and fixed some provisions in the farm bill. Truth be told, I don’t want to pay $8 for a gallon of milk.
MM: Definitely. Now that we’ve averted the dairy cliff, we should talk spending cuts.
JB: The dairy cliff?
MM:Seriously. That’s what dairy farmers I’ve spoken to called it. We should really move on.
JB: Before we discuss the monkey in the room, do you think the American public cares more about falling off the fiscal cliff or paying more for milk?
MM: C’mon, Joe.
JB: I’m serious, Mitch. Do people care about falling off a dairy cliff or a fiscal cliff?
MM: I guess, it depends on which will “cream” consumers more.
JB: That was not funny. At all.
MM: [sigh] Can we just talk about spending cuts?
JB: Fine.
Pause. All that resonates for a minute is the static buzz over the telephone line.
MM: Well?
JB: We just talked about it.
MM: What do you mean?
JB: Mitch, the president has insisted again and again that we want to minimize spending cuts to focus on tax increases on the wealthy. He couldn’t get that through to Boehner, so I suggest we table it. Besides, we've talked adjustments in tax rates already. You and I know this isn't exactly what Obama is looking for, so I think we should move on.
MM: Why is the president, and the Senate majority for that matter, unwilling to confront the central issue here? It shouldn't require a crisis for you guys to focus on the administration's spending addiction. I mean, you know we need to do it. When are we going to do it?
JB: With all due respect, Mitch, that's a bunch of malarkey. Spending isn't the problem here. We need to reduce the deficit, and the best way to do so is to raise taxes on the wealthy. Middle-class Joe shouldn't have to pay the same tax rate as wealthy Mitt.
MM: Hey, leave the Mitt alone. He’s relaxing with his family on beachfront in La Jolla. What should we do then? Congress isn't going to…
JB: You mean, the GOP.
MM: No, the House and Senate cannot possibly negotiate a deal without handling this debt ceiling. We are not going to move forward without somehow touching on how we are going to tackle spending cuts.
JB: Why don't we just toss a coin? Heads, we delay automatic spending cuts for two months. Tails, we stumble over the cliff and face economic hardships that will hurt American families. Do you want to put little Johnny and his family back in chains?
MM: Joe, that's probably not a good thing to say.
JB: You're right. But seriously, do you want to leave this deal to chance or negotiate some sort of compromise?
MM: I just don't see a clear way to appease both parties. Our national debt is over $16 trillion. We have to tackle both problems, not let the federal government spend as much as they please.
JB: I'll flip the coin then.
MM: No, I will.
JB: Don'tcha trust me, Mitch?
MM: Do you want an honest answer?
JB: Fine, I'll have an aide flip it.
MM: Which aide?
JB: Really, Mitch? You sound like Boehner.
MM: Just flip the coin.
[Biden flips the coin. It hits heads.]
JB: Looks like we're going after this two months from now. Thanks for reaching across the aisle, Mitch. I'm starving, who wants some Potbelly?