This week’s episode was surprisingly tame. Don’t get me wrong, there were plenty of dramatic moments, but none of the jaw-dropping, “oh no she didn’t” moments the show’s known for. Almost boring, actually. Surprisingly, it seems the show’s starting to really integrate plot points from the book, but they’re being added in a peculiar sort of way — out of context with slight variations. Are the writers running out of original ideas? Also who ever thought Cyndi Lauper would make a guest appearance on Gossip Girl?
Summary
- Jenny, whose hair looks a million times better, has been living with Agnes, her new business partner. They’ve been trying to find someone to support their designs, but Agnes keeps messing up the interviews, generally by being a crazy bitch. Jenny gets fed up with her partner bringing her down and arranges a deal with a company by herself. Too bad she needs parental permission to do business as a minor.
- With the other Humphrey: Dan gets a recommendation from the crazy professor with his Chuck Bass story, and the opportunity to write an exposé on Bart Bass for New York Magazine. It’s the 20th anniversary of Bass Industries, and they’d like Dan to use his connections to dig up some dirt. While Chuck tries to secure some father/son bonding time (cruelly rejected by Bart), Dan sucks up to the boss and gets to shadow him twice a week. Bart even wants to take Dan to the hockey game Chuck bought tickets for. Poor Chuck, neglected by Daddy for Dan. Who’s really just trying to ruin the family’s reputation.
- Blair’s mom has a new boyfriend: Cyrus Rose, who turns out to be Aaron’s dad. While Blair expects “Cary Grant,” she gets “Danny DeVito” — Cyrus is short, old and gives hugs. What a travesty. Actually, turns out it’s Blair’s 18th birthday. You’d think that would be the main focus of the episode, not a background that’s barely mentioned. As a grown woman, Blair resolves to be mature and accept Cyrus, but snaps and begins to plan sabotage. Meanwhile, Aaron and Serena are being all cute and couple-y. He even asks her to model for him, but unfortunately Aaron “the artist” has several other “models” hanging around.
- Agnes gets wind of Jenny’s rebellion and goes psycho. She takes all of Jenny’s designs, throws them in a trash can and lights them on fire. Then she kicks her out on the street. Jenny tries to emotionally blackmail Rufus into signing the papers, but he decides not to. Little J has a major emotional breakdown on the street but takes matters into her own hands when she accepts the business-guy’s offer of emancipating herself from her parents and becoming her own guardian.
- Dan gets a really juicy story about Bart. Apparently Bart burned down a building, collected the insurance money and founded his industrial empire off of that money. Corporate scandal: a journalist’s goldmine. However, he faces the moral dilemma of ruining his friends’ family in the process. After confronting Bart, he discovers the story is true and that there’s more to it: Someone died. But after Chuck pleads with Dan not to publish the story, Dan’s conscience wins out, and he gives his copy of the Chuck Bass story to Bart instead. Nice try, Dan, guess you’re just not cut out for the cutthroat world of journalism. Bart’s touched by the story and decides he wants to know his son. Chuck has a Daddy again!
- Blair sabotages the relationship but learns that Cyrus is actually a nice guy who makes her mom happy and develops a real conscience. Gasp. She reunites the couple but unfortunately they decide that Cyrus should move in. Guess she got more than she bargained for. Serena goes to confront Aaron about the other models but finds out he’s dating other people, since they never said they’d be exclusive. She breaks up with him, but after he comes the next morning to talk (he pulls the whole I-though-you-wouldn’t-be-like-your-parents bit), she decides to prove him wrong and embrace free love. By going to the park wearing a slip. Cool Serena.
Thoughts
- Seriously, I don’t understand how Blair’s 18th birthday is not a bigger deal. Looking back, I barely even remembered it happened. I don’t think Blair Waldorf would stand for that.
- Chuck/Bart bonding was the one of the most heartwarming things I’ve seen in a while. I knew Bart was mean, not because he thought Chuck killed his wife, but because Chuck reminds him of her. Cliché but cute. At least he’s learned that he needs to be more of a father to his son. Chuck deserves to be loved.
- This episode subtly makes journalists look like assholes. Destroy a family to break a story. Reminds me of Medill lectures, when they make us ethically debate between helping a guy on the edge of a bridge or standing there, taking pictures and getting the story. Note: I’d help the guy, I’m not a robot.
- How did Aaron put Serena’s face on a big-screen in Times Square? Also, how is Aaron’s entire problem about him being too popular with the girls?
- Is it just me or is Cyrus’s storyline about the Vietnamese girl eerily similar to Miss Saigon? Not exact, but close enough for me to be like wait, what? He’s just missing an illegitimate love-child.
Quotes
- Blair: “Dorota, are you insane? You used the everyday china, Cyrus will think we’re just common upper-middle class.”
- Hazel: “Even moms have boyfriends. And I don’t.”
Next Week
It’s the Thanksgiving episode! All about the different families, but there seems to be a focus on Nate — good thing, since he was entirely AWOL this week. Looks like Daddy Archibald is back, and the family’s reuniting. But does that mean Nate’s leaving the city for good? Nate’s friends don’t look too pleased.