Think of your favorite musician or band, and they’ve probably recorded a Christmas song. Even Justin Bieber has gotten in the game. But with so many songs to choose from, how does one form the perfect Christmas playlist? Here is a guide to some of the songs you need to include and the others you ought to avoid.
Best by a Jewish artist: "Christmas Time All Over the World" by Sammy Davis Jr.
Born to Christian parents, Sammy converted to Judaism in the mid-1950s. A decade later he recorded one of his classic tracks in this ode to multiculturalism and the Christmas spirit. Ironic? Perhaps. Iconic? Undoubtedly. Peppered with “Merry Christmas” in eight different languages, it’s the perfect mix of Rat Pack crooning and 1960s cheese.
Best rendition of "White Christmas": The Drifters
To place any version of "White Christmas" above Bing Crosby’s iconic crooning of the Irving Berlin classic is almost blasphemous. But, The Drifters’ soulful interpretation gets the nod for managing to not only do justice to one of the all-time greats, but also build upon it. With soaring falsetto played against doo-wop rhythms, The Drifters do something Bing did not quite manage: they made it fun.
Most Painfully Sentimental: "The Christmas Shoes" by NewSong
With lines like “and I want her to look beautiful if Mama meets Jesus tonight” and “I knew I'd caught a glimpse of heaven's love,” it’s clear that the Christian-rock group NewSong has not concerned itself with subtlety. In a little over four minutes, they manage to touch on impoverished youth, dying parents and the true meaning of “what Christmas is all about.” Now the progenitor of a made-for-TV movie starring Rob Lowe, Christmas shoppers can count on this one to dampen the mood just about any day of the season.
Most Offensive: "Do They Know It’s Christmas?" by Band Aid
When Sting, Phil Collins and a couple dozen British rockers got together in the mid-1980s to raise awareness for the Ethiopian famine, no one quite expected this exercise in white guilt. Band Aid’s carol features lines like “the only water flowing is the bitter sting of tears,” “the Christmas bells that ring there are the clanging chimes of doom,” and laments that “there won't be snow in Africa this Christmastime.” Apparently no one thought to consider that Africans might celebrate Christmas the same way as they do in London.
Most Obnoxious: "Dominick the Donkey" by Lou Monte
Recounting the story of Santa’s Italian Christmas Donkey, this jingle boasts a bouncing bassoon backbeat and liberal use of the donkey’s “hee-haw.” Add to that the onomatopoetic “clingety-cling” in the song’s chorus, and you begin to see how grating the tune can be. There are plenty of obnoxious Christmas songs, but “Dominick” might just take the cake.