Jug wine, 40s, and booze in plastic handles are staples of collegiate life. Not drinks, per se, but ethanol delivery vehicles. At the prices we're talking, most people can't be bothered to care what these things taste like, but in the best interest of your shitty booze adventures, dear reader, we shall review them here and try to uncover a few hidden gems from the bottom shelf that replace the tired favorites.
Our first victim is Blossom Hill merlot, a magnum (read: double) bottle of red wine for $5.99. Yes, for less than one might think to pay for a single bottle of wine, you can get two, in one comically large vessel. So what does your $0.75 glass of wine taste like? In a word — fruit. This is not a dry wine, not a complex wine. You couldn't say things like my all time favorite wine spectator writeup, "smells of cream and tastes of double cream." It's just a mellow red that avoids the totally chemical, harsh taste you get with old standbys like Carlo and Franzia.
As one reviewer, who probably has an oeneology degree, put it, "The wine is not a bad experience in terms of leaving a poor taste in the mouth. Rather the problem is that the wine leaves the question 'why bother?'" At $5.99 and easy-drinking as hell, we say, bother away.
Should you stay or should you go?: I'd give Blossom Hill a 4.5/5, almost perfect. Worth the switch from Carlo or Franzia.