Glancing at a list of the blocks of Dance Marathon requires a little reading between the lines. What the hell does “Block 9: Where’s My Spotlight?” even mean? We tell you which artists — new and old, funky and fresh — to expect in the 30 hours of DM.
Block 1: Dance for Danny
As always, the first block is all about pumping everyone up. In particular, all those great, mononymous musical artists get airtime: Jay, Whitney, Madonna and of course Beyoncé. Oh yeah, and the unavoidable Internet-meme songs.
Block 2: Thrift Shop
This block embodies the nostalgic feeling you get when you dust off the first album you bought in elementary school. Alternatively, it could also be the feeling you get when you watch your dad break out his dance moves to a song he heard at prom.
Also, inevitably: Macklemore.
Block 3: Adult Swim
Hey lil' mama lemme whisper in your ear and tell ya something that ya wouldn’t want your grandmother to hear. Don’t expect anything less than Snoop, Rihanna and some classic Khia.
Block 4: Let’s Get Weird
What the fuck? Who knows what goes down at 4 a.m.?
Block 5: Mickey Mouse Club
Before you got an iPod, before you toted around your Walkman, there was HitClips. And HitClips reigned supreme. These three hours bring back those trailblazers’ first forays into music.
Need we say any more? It’s Britney, bitch.
Block 6: British Invasion
This boy band has it all – cute accents, coordinated clothing and music that will last for years to come: One Direction. Sorry, were you thinking of something else?
Block 7: Bringing Down the House (Alumni Block)
This would be the highlight of DM if “A Colbert Christmas: The Greatest Gift of All!” by Stephen Colbert plays. That’s it. For all three hours. On loop.
Block 8: Space Jam
At the beginning of Block 8, the end is so close yet still so far. The DJs effectively play “Y.M.C.A.”, “Pump up the Jam” or any other kind of song that always plays during a sports movie’s montage.
Block 9: Where’s My Spotlight?
These songs are sassier than a season finale of “America’s Next Top Model” and saucier than a Minaj-Carey showdown. Just kidding, that’s a pretty accurate description.
Block 10: Danny Did and We Can Too
Feel-good jams galore to accompany the indescribable feeling that one gets when they’ve been dancing for 30 hours. Fun., Journey, Florence + the Machine and The Black Eyed Peas are a few obligatory artists. Honestly, it’s hard to hold in your tears when a Queen song is playing and you realize you’ve raised over $1 million.